Riddle Me This

Dear Ask a DnD Monster:

One of my friends really likes riddles and brain teasers.  He doesn't do it all the time, but sometimes, when we're hanging out, he'll come out with some brain teaser, and I'll just sit there feeling dumb.  Then, he tells me the answer with this smirk on his face.

I'd really like to get one on him, sometime.  Do you know any really good riddles or brain teasers that would stump him?  And they have to be unique so he can't look them up on the Internet.

Thanks,

The Riddler


Answer From: an Ochre Jelly
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Dear Riddler:

Look, lady, I gots no Intelligence score, so you are totally barking up the wrong tree, here.  You want a good riddle?  I got a good riddle for you.  What's fifteen feet across and can grapple you as a free action?  WHAM!

You want to take that smirk off that pretty boy's face?  How about instead of trying to outnerd him, you use a slam attack to envelop him and start secreting acid like John Goodman at a chili dog cookoff.  Who's laughing then, eh?  Yeah.  Kinda hard to be all cerebral when you're eating his face off.

How many marbles will I have to take out of the bag?  Oh, gosh, I don't know.  Why don't I think about that while my body burns the flesh off your bones?  Oh yeah, this one's a real stumper.  Gonna take a long time.  Yeah, you'll be feeling pretty superior by the time I've completely absorbed you as raw nutrients.  Hey hey!  Won't I feel dumb.  I mean, you gots this great marble story to demonstrate how great your brain is, and all I got is Improved Grab, immunity to piercing and slashing, and a lot of time on my hands.  Guess you got me, good, huh?  Maybe you can, you know, sit around thinking about that when you're a perfectly bleached pile of bones.  Oh, here's a good one: how did this bleached pile of bones get here?

Let me tell you, lady, you got two options.  You can get smarter than this guy, or you can smother and eat him.  I think we both know which one actually has a chance of happening, you know what I'm sayin?

Dan, the Ochre Jelly